An open letter to Moyes

I am being reminded that when life gives you a lemon, you are supposed to make a lemonade out of it – the same applied when life gives you a David, you have to make de Gea and not Moyes out of the scenario.

Even Deity would not be happy if you don’t make the best out of such a situation.

As the epitome of football’s desired standards, Manchester United is not an entity that attracts negativity and mediocrity as David Moyes did.

Dear Moyes, while some people, especially rival fans, would think highly of your mythical status, you were in essence a baggage to us.

Some people say that you were a genius, others contradict the same opinion in equal measure.

However, a good proportion of Manchester United fans hold the opinion that you were not in the right frame of mind or approach to occupy the most prestigious seat in football management circles.

In essence, it seems nobody polarizes opinion at Old Trafford more than you. When our Glasgow father announced that he was retiring from managing the best club in the world, all eyes switched to his replacement.

In reality, while we didn’t think the MUFC board would choose you as the ideal candidate to replacement one of the best managers in the football game ever, we at least hoped that you could show a little shade of what SAF advocated for.

We even thought that because your name started with letter M – just like Manchester United, you would have performed better than we could have thought.

There is a reason as to why the old adage suggests that if wishes were horses beggars would ride!

Talk in town is that you are extremely willing to shower us with a dose of what Boxing Day means – you are crafting a similar version of striking us where it matters most.

Sorry to puncture your thoughts Sir……. sorry, Mr. Moyes; we are intending to literally break football’s cardinal rules – whether written or not.

Whispers indicate that your team will be at the end of a footballing master-class when we meet.

Actually, the drive will be inspired by the mess you left at Old Trafford – there is no other degree of sarcasm that can outwit whatever you did at Manchester United.

Am hearing that you are within the margins that flirt with relegation in the English Premier League.

That is no coincidence Moyes – you don’t mess that which nature has appointed as the best and expect to have smiley faces on your side from the natural setting.

We have a collective thought that you will be very lucky not to ship in more than a dozen goals in the first half – that is a brazen statement to warn you not to try some intimidating tactics at the Theatres of Dreams.

Fans and haters alike admit that you have this mentality that shaped the Manchester United ideology in a negative manner after years of triumph.

In short, the misery that you left at Manchester United is of untold proportions.

It would not be criminal to boldly state that you have nothing that would ever reflect the ideological beliefs of Manchester United.

Some people would treat it as rumours but others wholly concur that you are the SI unit of that which represents clown-ism and bad choices.

That is superbly exemplified by the fact that you bought Fellaini and hauled him to Manchester United in a deal that was later to become an indicative aspect of how not to conduct business.

At times, am even compelled to suspect that you were on a mission to Manchester United albeit a wrong one – instead of fostering a team that would have continued with SAF’s legacy, you negated everything we had in our aspirations.

Fellaini’s transfer fee was even absurd given that it put him almost at per with Wayne Rooney’s price tag – we had this feeling that Fellaini’s fees were based on the value of his wig and not his capabilities on the field.

Yes, you may tell us that Fellaini did perform at Everton when you oversaw the club but that is yet another indicative feature that points to your ineffective approach – this is for the reason that Fellaini played well for Everton because it was a relatively mediocre club and hence he could replicate the same at Old Trafford!

To be honest with you Mr. Moyes, am struggling to find the right words to direct broadsides at you.

I am equally at pains when typing the name of Fellaini – if only I could use sign language to refer to him, and be sure I would be detained for using some not so appealing finger gestures!

Practically, to be fair and extremely honest – just as the Bible advocates, we were shocked to hear that you were the candidate to replace Sir Alex Ferguson.

Yes, you are Scottish just like Ferguson but apart from that, you share nothing else in common; while Sir Alex is a serial winner in the football management circles, you are nothing short of a colossal disappointment! Matters weren’t helped by the fact that you were poached from the city of Liverpool – yes, you may not have been the manager of Liverpool’s red half but you managed the blue half of Liverpool.

There is a reason as to why they claim that you weren’t cut from the same cloth as the legendary Sir Alex Ferguson.

In fact, am sorry to inform you that you would rank worse than the likes of Pardew and Allardyce, reason being that you tarnished the good name of Manchester United.

The publications claimed that you had stated that United lacks that classy and appealing trait that distinguished the club from the rest.

At this point, I am forcing myself not to chuckle and cry at the same time – if only I would bribe to have your face greeted with endless knocks and slaps.

At this juncture, I remember that you have all the hallmarks of the negative traits that you claim to be manifested in Manchester United.

That can be highlighted by the fact that you are managing the lowly Sunderland FC, and by extension serves as a reminder that you are not as great as we would have hoped.

#DavidMoyes #20132014 #Opinion